An open letter to Santa.

by Elizabeth on November 29, 2008 · 3 comments

in Stuff

Dear Santa,

Let’s not beat around the bush. We both know which of your lists has my name on it this year, and the many, many ways in which I earned my status. I think we’re also on the same page about how much fun I had getting there.

Look, you seem like a great guy. You’re always laughing at the hos, so I’m pretty sure you have a good sense of humour. Word on the street is that you also like to drink on the job, so already you sound like my kind of person. You wouldn’t begrudge me the little bit of fun I’ve had this year, would you?

I understand your strict naughty/nice policy, but aren’t you sick of those goody-two-shoes kids by now? Nobody has to know that you bent the rules for little old me! I’ve even gone to the trouble of developing a short-list from which to choose.

(Maybe address them to my dog Harry so that none of the elves catch on. It’s the perfect crime.)

Thanks in advance, big guy. Come through for me this year, and I’ll forget all about the childhood trauma you caused when that pony never came.


Tiffany 1837 circles lariat
A timeless Tiffany favorite. Interlocking circles lariat in sterling silver. 18″ long.

Elsa Peretti Teardrop Earrings
Reminiscent of a solitary raindrop or a shining bead of morning dew. Hoop earrings in sterling silver, for pierced ears. Original designs copyrighted by Elsa Peretti.

Pandora bracelet
Build your own bracelet

Crumpler 7 Million Dollar Home

Hot Air Balloon Flight

PS: I am still accepting ponies.

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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

rhiannon December 1, 2008 at 9:17 am

oh my god!!! I want that necklace!!!


Holly December 4, 2008 at 7:21 pm

LOL this is awesome! I especially like the Pandora bracelet, it’s so pretty!


Santa Claus December 15, 2008 at 9:14 am

I have to say that you have impeccable taste. Unfortunately, I am seeing your open letter just a little late. It really is best to mail the letter directly to me. Or use email. Maybe next year….

As compensation though for not being able to fill your request, I have moved you over to the nice list.

I hope you have a very Merry Christmas!

– Santa

Santa Claus
CEO, North Pole Inc.


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