Elizabeth August 27th, 2010
Happy Friday!
The weekend is nearly here, and the thought of it makes my heart all smiley. We’re planning to jump in our car and drive until we find some snow. We’re going to take some photos, build a snowman and return with a happy & wet dog.
Can’t wait!
What have you got planned?
Elizabeth May 4th, 2010
I’m waiting for the day that somebody offers to film me in high definition, as I leap for an airborne cupcake in open-mouthed slow motion.
What? Why is it okay for dogs and not for me?
Elizabeth January 14th, 2010
I didn’t think it was fair to keep this to myself when it was emailed to me this morning.
Please raise your hand if you relate!
Twas the month after Christmas,
And all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
Not even a blouse.The cookies I’d nibbled,
The chocolate I’d taste
At the holiday parties
Had gone to my waist.When I got on the scales
There arose such a number!
When I walked to the store
(less a walk than a lumber),I’d remember the marvelous meals I’d prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I’d never said, “No thank you, please.”As I dressed myself in my husband’s old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt…
I said to myself, as I only can,
“You can’t spend a winter, disguised as a man!”So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.I won’t have a cookie, not even a lick.
I’ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won’t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.I’m hungry, I’m lonesome, and life is a bore…
But isn’t that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.
Perhaps I should go for a run.
Elizabeth January 13th, 2010
It’s the middle of the week, and two weeks into the new year the holiday euphoria has well and truly worn off. You don’t want to read anything deep and meaningful on a day like this, right?
So, here is a post full of funny pictures.
Brought to you by my mum, and the “forward” button in her hotmail inbox.
Elizabeth November 26th, 2009
Tim sent this latest Pictures for Sad Children cartoon to me today, and I can’t imagine what made him think I would like it! Perhaps it was because our own dog was a miserable sack of sadness this morning when we left the house?
I have never known a creature to convey such depths of depression. In the picture below is the (obscured) face of a dog who is so depressed about one of his people leaving for the day, that he cannot even be bothered to shake off the cap that covers his head.
I don’t know how he copes with his terrible life. I hope you’ll spare him a thought.
Elizabeth October 30th, 2009
I think most of us can agree that Bonnie Tyler’s Total Eclipse of the Heart is one of the easiest songs to parody. I’ve written about this once before, upon discovering literal videos for the first time:
And now Jeannie of koufukuron has turned it into a flow chart!
(Click the image to open fullsize in a new window)
Jeannie also inspired the Hey Jude flow chart by Love All This:
The nerd in me loves this, so tell me if you spot any others!
Elizabeth October 26th, 2009
Today I had a breakthrough. I realised that no matter what I do, my parents will continue to send email forwards to my inbox, complete with all the >>>>>>> characters you can imagine.
I have decided to stop fighting it.
However, part of the deal is that I share the bearable ones with you. Please enjoy a charming tale about a dog who can talk, courtesy of my dad!
A man driving around the backwoods of Montana sees a sign in front of a broken down house; ‘Talking Dog For Sale.’ He rings the bell, and the owner appears and tells him that the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.
‘You talk?’ he asks.
‘Yep,’ the Lab replies.After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he asks ‘So, what’s your story?’
The Lab looks up and says, ‘Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help my country, so I contacted the CIA. In no time at all, they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.’
‘I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t getting any younger. So I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible drug deals and was awarded a batch of medals.’
‘So I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I’m just retired.’
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner how much he wants for the dog..
‘Ten dollars,’ the guy says.
‘Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?’‘Because he’s a liar. He never did any of that shit’
I know. I’m mad at me too.
Elizabeth October 25th, 2009
This is easily the funniest thing I’ve seen on YouTube in weeks…
Elizabeth October 25th, 2009
I discovered Christoph Niemann today, thanks to a link from the brilliant Information is Beautiful. These images were selected from a blog post he created for the New York Times on the complexity of sleep.
Click that link to read the whole series – it didn’t feel right to repost the whole thing here!
His Web site is christophniemann.com. Take a look at the rest of his portfolio there, including many covers of the New Yorker and the books he has written and illustrated.
I hate mosquitoes.
What with all that buzzing and itching, the hubbub they cause is disproportionate to the microdrop of blood they make away with. Besides, I am the world’s most formidable mosquito hunter. I have brought to justice every single mosquito that has ever attacked me (except when I spend nights in rooms with patterned wallpaper, which makes mosquito hunting impossible).
The second most wonderful thing about sleeping is the sensation of your cheek meeting the cool half of the pillow after you’ve turned from one side to the other. I found that it takes about 45 minutes for the other end to completely cool down again so the procedure can be repeated.
Winter is coming, and slipping into a cold bed is tough. But believe it or not, sometimes when I go to bed before my wife does, I will offer her the half that I have just warmed up.
I obviously love her very, very much.
Elizabeth October 23rd, 2009
This is the first photo ever taken of the two of us in which Tim has hair!
(With thanks to the magic of Yearbook Yourself and these cute desktop boyfriend and girlfriend photo holders…)
| Completed: 73/101 | |||||||||
Keep track as I complete my 101 Things in 1001 Days challenge (commencing Jan 1st, 2008).
